Wednesday, September 01, 2004

He's Back!

Tacitus, after going AWOL Tuesday, was either bailed from jail or found his way out of the brothel -- at any rate, he found a universal handcuff key and managed to remove the ball-gag-mask -- and is back to blogging RNC events for

Needless to say, he hasn't lost his touch:
Michael Mack, 35-year old chairman of the "Young" Republicans,

Ooooh. The quotes around Young denote high comedy. Wit just doesn't get anymore biting.
was trotted out to speak with all the bloggers. As is its wont,

Guh! He used the "wont" word that doesn't contain an apostrophe and isn't a contraction. See, the use of such tastefully appointed english is what makes Tacitus the second coming of Henry Fucking James (if only with regard to style; substantively, Henry James was an anti-imperialist which in Tacitus's world means freedom-hating), at least in the minds of so many Faulknerian Idiot Man-Children among the right.
RS studiously ignored the prepackaged offering

High standards indeed except for the bothersome fact that the whole fucking purpose of any convention is to push prepackaged offerings. Yet I hope Tacitus stays true to his ideal, for then we will be spared any commentary on the speeches.
Oops, I guess not.
Besides, it was a lie to begin with.
until our ears pricked up at this exchange:

I smile when I see him use "pricked".
Mack: "I thought Schwarzenegger was positively Reaganesque."

"Wait a minute -- you're describing a man who disagrees with nearly every one of Reagan's positions as Reaganesque?"

"Yes! He was Reaganesque!"

"How is that Reaganesque?"

"He was charismatic! Dynamic!"

"By that criteria, Barack Obama was Reaganesque!"

Pause. Frozen grin. Then, turning away from one of the bloggers with whom he was brought out to speak: "Hey, I'm doing an interview here."

Typical. The only authentic wit (and I'm being generous here on the basis that it came in conversation -- by nature impromptu -- rather than in writing, which insists on a higher standard) in the whole post was stolen from someone else. But then the wit's co-opted point is indeed very much Tacitus's: a telegenic Austrian reactionary, railing, in a thick Germanic accent, against liberals and International Organisations, who extolls the virtues of strength, is somehow just too moderate for True Blue Republicans. Well, that's nice to know.

Let's see, what else?

Tacitus was worried that Zell Miller's speech wouldn't be reactionary enough. Remember that he has high standards. Similar to his fretting over whether Rick "Homos=Dog Fuckers" Santorum's "values", of which Tacitus approves, would be given proper airing during the convention. Plainly, Tacitus wants to put wingnuttery at the forefront of Republicanism.

He shouldn't worry, but then I suppose it's nice to know that he's for at least a kind of "truth in advertising."