Monday, August 30, 2004

More Assorted Crap: Covering the Coverage

I checked in to see if the Oxblog (which Seb says is basically the Corner, only slightly better-written) dorks had anything to say on the spy scandal but instead found out that David Adesnik was too busy masturbating to fret over such quotidian things.
OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! Miss America Erika Harold is visiting Bloggers Row!

Right. And more of the same:

ARI FLEISCHER'S GUIDE TO RED-HOT G.O.P. LOVE: Washington icon Ari Fleischer gave Bloggers' Row ten minutes of his time this afternoon.

Icon??? Pfft.

Meanwhile, Tacitus, presumably to avoid Adesnik's unseemly eruption of G.O.P. goo, heads for the streets so that he too may sate his carnal desires. Alas, he is disappointed by the "Kerry Voters" who apparently lack the granny panties and tighty whities he finds properly patriotic.
It's not just the disturbing underwear that's, er, disturbing

An excellent display, by the way, of "pure writing craft". Thrill us with more, mighty wordsmith!

Elsewhere, Tacitus is proud to note that he met the man who wished to serve Richard Nixon by conspiring to kill reporters, G. Gordon Liddy, whose personality of over the top, abjectly humourless, utter ridiculousness is so much like, er, Tacitus's prose style. Maybe if Liddy and Howard Hunt could even attempt to spike Muskie's drinks with LSD, an aged Liddy could do us one last favour and uncork a tank of nitrous oxide in the air conditioner ducts of Someone, please, give this nitwit Tacitus a sense of humour.

Later, he bemoans the lack (sic -- relative; Tacitus evidently wishes that the playbill was exclusively composed of unreconstructed social obstructionist nutcases, the likes of which made Pat Buchannon's '92 speech go over so well) of social conservatives, and then makes cozy with Rick "Gay sex=sex with dogs" Santorum.

Do social conservatives rule the party? Not enough, I say.

Yeah, that's right. Obviously, the party needs more underwear inspectors like Tacitus, whom I shall refer to from now on as Inspector 12.

*Update: As usual, TBOGG is annihilating.

**UpdateUpdate: Ezra at Pandagon offers his analysis, which is appropriately damning. But, alas, he was wrong to begin with. Tacitus never deserved the respect far too many lefties gave him -- the guy always was a jackass. Just because he occasionally deigned to lecture snarling righties doesn't mean he wasn't just as ideologically extreme. If one will but look, his alleged sobriety was only a matter of prose style and never substance, it was an illusion. Give me a snarling, shrill righty any day before a smug, condescending, dissembling jackass.

***Edit -- Reworked a sentence so that its blade, as it were, slices more cleanly.