Tuesday, March 09, 2004


"These geeks used to be called Trekkies, but now insist on the less derogatory term Trekkers, which is the image control equivalent of adding a koala bear to the Nazi flag."

Thus Seanbaby pauses to obliterate Star Trek nerds before going back down his list of the various cliques of doofi, in his classic article Dork Storm: The Annihilation.

Of those our author waylays, the one group that to me hits rather too close to home are the Star Wars nerds, something I have more or less been since age 4. Still, I don't dress up unless it's Halloween; and the example set by my brother's rabid geekiness for everything Lucas quite keeps me in line.

But where oh where are sabremetricians in Seanbaby's list? They are about the only fair game among sports fans for Seanbaby's special treatment, one would think, and this is in itself is a problem.

Though math nerds are often socially inept retards (thus the pocket-protectored cliche), when combined with sports-love (a la sabremetricians) they still can't be meaningfully worse than drunken boors (such as your blogger) who infest sports bars and bleachers; nor can they be fairly made fun of more than garden-variety jogging-suit-wearing fatties who have every banal sports factoid memorised.

As that Onion article (which I can't find) demonstrated, walking sports databases and walking sci-fi databases have little to feel uppity about when considering the other.

But anyway... the beauty of -- and even, perhaps just maybe, the intent of -- cruel humour is being unfair. Seanbaby spared sportsgeeks this time; maybe he's a 49ers or Giants fan, or maybe he just didn't have room for sportsdorks in a top ten list. Whatever; it's his prerogative, which he makes damn fine use of, because he gives no quarter.